Relationships

For Queer Girls, Simping Is a Love Language

I’m embracing the label, with all its yearning, try-hard connotations, because desire shouldn’t be embarrassing and love does require trying hard.

May 02, 2022
Finding Love When You’re Forty and Happily Single

My identity is tied up in my singleness, my childlessness, and I’m not sure I want to let that go.

Apr 06, 2022
Unlearning My Immigrant Mother’s Ideas of Beauty

Like many immigrant daughters, I’m of a lineage of women who didn’t put themselves first.

Mar 31, 2022
After My Divorce, I Found Comfort in Cohousing

I’m not sure I want to be vulnerable or join a community. I’m not sure I even remember how.

Mar 30, 2022
Group Chats Don’t Replace Friendship—They Can Keep It Alive

The group chat is a means, not an end. Not what our friendship is, but what keeps it alive.

Mar 08, 2022
Embracing My Queerness in the Wake of Grief

I wondered how I would confront what I thought was my worst: my sexuality.

Sep 23, 2021
To Get Through My Divorce, I Raised the Golem

It was an acrimonious divorce. I wanted justice. I settled for truth.

Sep 16, 2021
How My Hometown Homie Makes Me Feel Beautiful

In any serious picture of me, I am not comfortable enough to look directly into the lens. I don’t know if I will ever be.

Aug 12, 2021
A Gay Gaye Holud for Two Bengali Brides

Promiti Islam on queerness, Bengali-American identity, and the complexities of family acceptance,

May 27, 2021
The Silence of My White Friends After Atlanta

I wondered: Who was I when I first formed this friendship?

May 20, 2021
Sending My Son Out of America to Save Us Both

I didn’t want it to make sense—to send my children away for who knows how long—but I did need them to survive. I needed to survive.

Every Immigrant Is in a Long-Distance Relationship

Distance, though it may be physically distancing, need not make a couple grow distant.

May 13, 2021
Moving Past Silence as One Relationship Ends and Another Begins

For a decade I’d tricked myself into believing I was happily married, never thinking there could come a time when the trick no longer worked.

May 12, 2021
Breakdancing Shaped Who I Am As a Black Man and Father

I discovered breakdancing in that VHS time capsule, and that was as close as I’d ever get to a culture that did not exist where I lived.

Apr 19, 2021
Grieving When You Can’t Gather

Nora Feely on loss during the pandemic, chosen families, and the small but devastating things 2020 took away.

Apr 13, 2021
Kindness Makes Us Neighbors

I know my neighbors now a little bit better than before.

Mar 10, 2021
How to Build a Life with Your Chosen Family

I was already in love with all my friends. But in my newfound singleness, I was falling in love with them more deeply.

Aug 06, 2020
Do Not Marry a Politician and Other Kitchen Table Things

I've long been taught that the appearance of a good marriage, not a good marriage necessarily, is the ultimate goal.

Jun 29, 2020
Montana Boys

We were all looking for the exceptions; all of us. Our conversations about white people had by now become banal.

Jun 10, 2020
Scabies Taught Me Social Distancing Doesn’t Mean Disconnection

I wasn’t alone in this experience that had made me feel so isolated, so removed from everyone.

May 21, 2020